...ok, so where was i?...oh yes...saturday night i went to see u.s. maple @ the abbey pub w/ dave & ellen & keom...it was fun hanging out, and phil joined us with his roomie kiara...teddy was GONNA go, and we even picked him up from work, but on the way to the show, he tells us that he switched schedules to do a 5am - 1pm shift the next morning so he could go to a christmas family thing in the afternoon...so we dropped him off at the 'L' so he could go get some sleep...the rest of us paid $12 for the show and sat around and read the reader and the new city (which had a nice blurb about watchers by the way...dave chamberlain considers watchers' to the rooftops one of the best albums of 2003...that's nice...)...anyways, the show was rather disappointing...the guys seemed really tired on stage, and off stage, some portions of the audience were annoyingly drunk and harrassing innocent bystanders...*sigh*...sometimes you see bad shows...part of life...



...sunday i woke up practically immobile from a sharp pain in the neck...i have no idea what from...i still have it, but not as severe...sunday evening was the last adventures in advent w/ my friend nanette...go see pictures here...we burned some frankincense that night, which you can see in some of the pictures...i swear, i thought the smoke alarm was gonna go off at one point because the entire sanctuary was filled w/ smoke...but it sure smelled lovely...



...so i got a call from my friend caleb last night...it was an unexpected and lovely surprise to actually hear his voice...caleb, for those of you who don't know, is my divinely appointed friend...no joke...you see, on the night my father passed away, god knew that with my dad no longer in the world, i'd need someone else to kinda help me along and be a source of assurance that there was hope and that not all christians were assholes or idiots...so two hours after my dad died, caleb sent me an email after finding my website due to some bill mallonee photos i had posted...caleb has been a most valued friend ever since...he is like my guardian prophet, telling me just what i need to hear, even though he may not know it...anyways, it was great to catch up with him and just hear how happy he is now that he's engaged and getting married next summer...



...talking to caleb last night made me think about what a great thing it is to be in love, to be commited to someone you are in love with, and just what a miracle such a thing can be...i was reminded of my friend andy out in seattle who also recently got engaged and the email he sent me in which he concurred that 'tis oh so grand to be in love...which led me think of track 2 from the postal service album...yes...i'm liable to be shot for this, but i can't help being sucked in by this little ditty of a song...for once, let's throw off the shackles of sophistication and snobbery that originate in our fears and insecurities...let's shed that thick coat of skin grown to defend ourselves against the next heartbreak which is probably just around the corner...let's be happy for once that there actually are people in love, even if we ourselves may have never experienced it in our own lives--yet...allow me to be sappy for 2 minutes...sing it altogether now:



i am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes

are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned

i would like to speculate that god himself did make us into

corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces from the clay

and true, it may seem like a stretch, but its thoughts like this that

catch my troubled head when you're away and i am missing you to death

when you are out there on the road for several weeks of shows and when

you scan the radio, i hope this song will guide you home



they will see us waving from such great heights, "come down now,"

they'll say but everything looks perfect from far away,

"come down now," but we'll stay...



i tried my best to leave this all on your machine but the persistent beat

it sounded thin upon listening

and that frankly will not fly, you will hear the shrillest highs and

lowest lows with the windows down when this is guiding you home.



such great heights, lyrics by ben gibbard



like i said...ben gibbard's voice makes me swoooooooooon...



in other news, gapersblock.com posted one of my photos in the daily "rearview" photo section for today, 12/22/2003...if you don't see my photo, click on the little red back arrow beneath the current photo in the rearview section and scroll back a few times, depending on how many days AFTER 12/22 you're looking at the site...thank you naz!



been listening to--

no good for no one now--owen

s/t--owen

the denison witmer collection

hark!--sufjan stevens

noel--sufjan stevens

enjoy your rabbit--sufjan stevens

spoon and rafter--mojave3

univesal truths and cycles--guided by voices

reject all american--bikini kill

s/t--all time quarterback

dollar movie--goner

give up--the postal service

...ok, caleb, and everyone else out there who are wondering, here's the explanation...chicago sticker # 2 below is part of vincent dermody's "LOVE CHICAGO/HATE THE CIRCLE" project...you can read about it by clicking here...just scroll down till you see the graphic of the sticker...in short, it's a response to the "I (BLUE DOT) CHICAGO" t-shirt designed by local musician/danny's manager/blahblahblahster kevin stacy...reckless sells those shirts...you've seen 'em i'm sure...it's all silly serious silly blahblahblah apples and oranges lemons and kiwis...and i stand nowhere on this issue...i'd probably go more for the "I HEART CHICAGO" stance...but it's local *ster talk, and these stickers are pretty much everywhere, as you can see here...



so that's the scoop, dude...btw, i can't find your address, so your xmas card is going to the P's...



and in other news, today i do christmasy things AGAIN, this time involving a visit to my local favorite the art gallery kafe! yay!



and maybe a photoshoot...



and maybe us maple @ the abbey pub tonight w/ dave & keom, if i can convince teddy to go too...



i'm hungry...bye!

ok...so i stayed home from work to do christmasy stuff...what i have accomplished so far is finding a bunch of addresses for folks who live far away so that i can send them cards this year...i assembled around 20 cards using various photos from the past year or so...teddy & dave picked me up around 12:20 to go meet ellen @ bourgeoise pig for lunch...it was yummy & fun & a much needed break...teddy & dave had been working most of yesterday evening and this morning designing & assembling a flyer advertising gift certificates for drum lessons for teddy...it's a snazzy looking flyer...dave is great at that stuff...he even designed a font for teddy's name...i am rather covetous of that font...i want my own font too...after lunch, we went to various places to post the ad and then to trader joe's on clybourn so dave could shop and then we dropped off dave & teddy went into jinx cafe on division to post an ad and i saw these stickers on some poles by where we parked...it's gonna be my new project...taking photos of stickers on stuff...and these two stickers are somewhat unique to chicago for reasons that are obvious and maybe not so obvious to others...whatever...



teddy is cooking dinner right now...what a sweet boyfriend he is! i am a disheveled mess...i didn't go out last night to the watchers show, but i got showered and all dressed up and was ABOUT to go, but then teddy called me at the last minute and i got to see him a little bit and considering i've hardly seen him all week, it was not a hard decision to make to stay home...but to save time in the morning, i slept w/ my hair still in the little side braid and i didn't wash my face (i know that sounds gross, but i'd spent a lot of time on my mascara) and so when teddy gave me 5 minutes to get ready before he picked me up for lunch, i just put on the same clothese and ran out the door...i had to wear my hat though cuz my hair was hopeless...



after dinner, we're gonna go to the art store cuz i needs some supplies and then to transitions to buy some gifts or what not...looking for some old catholic mystics stuff...



ok, bye!

...our IT dept at work tried to upgrade our server the other day and basically crashed everything...no one really got anything done today...except for me perhaps...i had backups of backups on my old laptop that i got some use out of...the more than minor inconvenience of being unnetworked caused me to stay later at work than intended...everyone pretty much shooed home around 4...i was there until past 6...and then traffic was not nice, so i stopped at the target in highland park to buy some materials to do my yearly tentative christmas mailings...every christmas, i attempt to send stuff out, and except for the people in my immediate vicinity or the people i value very very highly, nobody gets anything from me...but i do think about you all...it's not like i don't love you or anything...



...another reason i stayed late at work is that i'm taking the day off tomorrow to do more christmasy things...like write cards...if i get 'em made that is...all i'm doing is printing some wallet size photos and inserting them into some little christmas photo cards that i found at target...i will be a real bitch tomorrow, for sure, cuz i hate printing photos...and what i hate even more is cutting them down to size...but i don't really have that many friends, so i think i'll be okay...



and the question of the moment is...should i or shouldn't i go to the watchers/joggers show @ the bottle tonight? i'm so tired...and i'm gonna go see lying in states tomorrow @ gunther murphys if all goes as planned...i've been feeling like quite the wus lately when it comes to going out...i think i need new hobbies or i need to join a knitting circle or something...bleah...i think i'm gonna hit the shower now...



been listening to--

the best of--denison witmer

s/t--hidari mae

get lost--magnetic fields

sufjan galore

...i think i suffer from SADD...i don't even remember what that stands for...but i know it's seasonal and a disorder, and i KNOW i'm at LEAST seasonally disordered, so i'm sure i qualify...i miss the sun...i miss outdoor warmth...my thoughts are drifting westward, towards the pacific oceanic states...my body on the other hand is stuck in frigid chicago...somebody really needs to invent teleportation...i have half a thought to follow my friend john b. to cancun this winter...he's been going w/ his mom every year around the beginning of february for all the years that i've known him...i've never been to mexico...it sure would feel nice & toasty right about now...i know i talk about moving west every winter, and this will be no exception...why break a longstanding time honored tradition such as this? i'm only half-joking though...if i really did find a job that could pay all my bills out in seattle, i'd break my lease in a heartbeat, throw as much of my shit in my subaru as possible and start driving northwest...although, i have to admit that part of the allure of the emerald city recently relocated itself to dansville, ny, which is like way in the opposite direction, when ryan & jesse moved back to the east a month ago...still, i think i could have lots of fun in seattle...ian would be nearby, allbeit on an island...and matt & laurel & erik are still there...and i'd actually get to hear some of my favorite music live a lot more often, with rosie & damien & hidari mae & others located out thataways...i'm all talk...but just you wait...one of these days i will surprise everyone including myself by following through on my threats...



...i've been trying to gather up all my lost photos that have wandered off munching on the neighbor's grass, and it's been a monumental task to say the least...my files are scattered across 3 desktops and 3 laptops in 3 different towns in 2 different counties...as far as i know, they're all in the state of illinois, however...so today's shots are old stuff that i dug up that i didn't think much of at first, but upon 2nd glance, i kinda like them...i need some kind of software to organize my photos online or something...it's really getting out of hand...i probably have around 20,000 digital photos, most of which are rubbish, but i'm as big a pack rat in the virtual world as i am in the material world, so i need to buy an external harddrive...



...tomorrow watchers are playing w/ joggers @ the empty bottle...i'm considering going to this show...maybe erin will be there...i do wanna see the joggers...watchers did a miniminitour w/ them a little over a year ago, and i met them @ the milwaukee show...the drummer worked @ the blackbird in portland, oregon, where i accompanied serene & the gloria record a year ago...anyways, it's been too damn long since i've been to a show...i really should've gone to schuba's tonight for the wluw xmas singalong...the detholz were on the roster as well as steve & liam from frisbie...damn...i wonder if jenn & john were there...oh well...



been listening to--

when we were small--rosie thomas

you are free--cat power

'cross the big pond--VoL

lost souls--doves