Three Thoughts Thursday #6

#1—I've been wondering how the digital age will affect the long-term memories of the babies and children of today. Take Cadence, for example. She's had just about every few days documented for her since birth, and that's pretty lazy on my part compared to some of my more dedicated photog friends who document their kids every day. Does this mean that she and her friends w/ equally photo fanatic parents will retain MORE long-term memories when they are older than we in the older generation have managed to do thus far?

I've mentioned my own loss of memories before, and I can't help thinking that if my parents had taken more photographs as I was growing up, or if I had taken up photography seriously as a kid rather than after grad school that I'd remember so much more. Like how many snapshots from their everyday life growing up do most people my age own? Maybe a bunch of baby photos—the new born shot, the embarrassing naked bath shot (which my mother dug up for my mixed-company 14th birthday party), messy eating shot, first step shot, etc.—and a few at holidays and birthdays until one reached the age of bershon, at which point our parents gave up trying to take our photos or they stopped being interested in preserving the moment for posterity, considering the cost of film and processing.

Aside from these pictorial cues, we are dependent on our diaries, school records, and our memories, which over time become like the shifting sand--changing details here, covering up entire segments there, uncovering little tidbits here, washing away portions there.

But I'm not talking about aging folk like myself. I'm talking about the kids that will have so many special and mundane moments preserved for them that they could quite possibly remember everything. What will happen then? Will their brains explode? Or will the human brain adapt to this sudden increase in use of hard drive space? Will it affect other brain functions? Will there be less forgiveness if there's less forgetting?

One of my favorite documentary series is the UP Series, which follows a group of British youth every seven years from the time they are 7 in 1964 up to the present, the most recent being 49 Up just released a couple years ago. Ted and I watched the entire series over a few days, and it was quite fascinating to watch these kids grow up literally before your very eyes.

With blogs and online photo communities like Flickr, that's kind of what we're doing now with each others' kids and lives. I've been on Flickr since Cadence was 7 months old, and I've watched so many other kids her age or a little older or younger grow into toddlerhood with her. I wonder what these kids will think about all this when they're older. I've heard of a columnist for a newspaper who often wrote about her family being asked by her son to stop writing about him because he was tired of total strangers coming up to him and acting like they knew him because they followed his mom's column. Will Cadence feel the same way? I guess I'll have to ask her one of these days…I don't know what I'd blog about if not her, so that may be the end of my online life then.

#2—Speaking of blogs, I've been really busy lately and feel like I'm not spending enough time reading up and commenting on you peoples' blogs. I'm actually doing more reading than commenting, so I am TRYING to keep up. I wish we could get together at a local coffee shop and just chat face to face. Yes, I realize I type much better than I chat (I suck at the chat, actually), but I feel the need for real and tangible relationships. Not that online relationships are not real—some of them have been the most rewarding and helpful to me. I guess what I'm trying to say (really badly, I might add) is that all you folks who come visit over here mean a lot to me, and I'm grateful for your friendship and I WISH y'all just lived in my neighborhood so we could hang out (and you could babysit Cadence once in awhile since y'all think she's so cute). So here. This is a virtual hug from me to you: <= =>

(Lori, can't wait to see you next weekend!)

#3—I think I may have to go out and find me some paht-bingsoo this weekend. That would be the perfect way to start the summer off right! If any of you Chicagoans are interested, let's meet up at Outdoor Café on Bryn Mawr!

Three Thoughts Thursday #5

#1— This has been a beautiful week weatherwise in Chicago (although we could use some rain soon, I'm sure). We live about a mile from the lake, and I've been there with Cadence a few times this past week. I was reminded again just how beautiful it is to live by a big body of water like Lake Michigan. I know I rave about summers in Seattle, but when you think about it, summers in Chicago are pretty damn nice too.

I know that we don't live by the BIGGEST of the Great Lakes, but it still looks like an ocean to me. You can't help but be filled with a sense of awe while looking out on the vast waters beneath a huge endless sky. I just don't get tired of this. Ever.

#2—Something I wonder and worry about every 3 days or so is where, when and how to send Cadence to school. Ted and I have seriously considered homeschooling, cuz let's face it—Chicago Public Schools are not exactly stellar. But lately, Cadence has shown an interest in going to school. She's run into kids from a nearby preschool at a local playground, and she really seems to want to be a part of that whole scene. I guess playing with an entire group of people her own size is more appealing than same old boring mom and dad. So I guess we are open to the idea of sending her to school. Lord knows Ted could probably use the break. And now we have to ask ourselves when we think a good time would be to enroll her. And considering most schools require that you apply a good 6-9 months in advance, we may need to decide WHERE to send her sooner than we'd like.

Part of it will depend on the luck of the draw, literally, as I hear the best public schools in the city have a pretty competitive lottery system of admission. I've thought about packing up the family and moving into the neighborhood of certain schools so that we'd have a better chance of getting in. But I'd hate to go through all that trouble and end up not getting in at all.

I feel like so much of public education in the last decade has focused a ridiculous amount of time on testing, which I think is stupid and a waste of taxpayer dollars. I was surprised to find that an increasing number of schools have done away with recess. I don’t want Cadence to be stuck in a learning environment where she's forced to fill in an endless array of bubbles with a #2 pencil day after day. That's not what I call learning. That's what I call mind-numbing, brain-cell-annihilating exercise in futility.

#3—Lately, I've been thinking that it would be nice to have a large family. I'm actually a big supporter of folks who choose to have only one child. In the U.S., having just one kid has the environmental impact of having maybe 30 kids or more in certain parts of the developing world. This is something I actually have thought about a lot. On the other hand, I've ALWAYS wanted to be in a big family, and I really enjoy the dynamics among Ted and his siblings. Cadence is such a social kid that I think she's really going to give us a hard time if we don't provide her with some siblings. Now don't jump to the conclusion that Ted and I are gonna get busy for a #2 anytime soon. Adding another family member would be a significant change to the current family environment, and we need to think about this more. I know some of you are laughing at me, but dude…Cadence is a flippin' handful…A very cute, sweet and charming handful, but still…Maybe what she needs is a lot of cousins…

Three Thoughts Thursday #4

#1—I've been thinking lately about my "past" lives. No, I'm not talking about "past" as in previous lives, but as in the totally different people I've been over the course of my 35 years. It's just so weird to think back to the various identities and sets of beliefs and circles of friends I've had. I've even had a number of different names. You'd think I couldn't make up my mind on who I was or something.

It's always a little awkward when I run into someone from one of these former lives. I have no idea what they've heard through the grapevine about my life since I last saw them. It's especially weird if they just assume that I'm the same as I ever was, especially regarding my thoughts on God and the Church (and by Church, I mean mainly the evangelical church in the U.S.).

Sometimes, though, it's a pleasant surprise to run into someone I haven't seen in a while. Like yesterday, at the Common, when I ran into a guy named Dave Fleuchaus who I used to go to church with. It was a very brief encounter, but still really nice, and I got to introduce him to Ted and Cadence. It's funny how a flood of memories can rush back from when you were essentially someone else. I sure do miss a lot of the people…

#2—Whenever summer rolls around, my thoughts drift towards the Pacific Northwest, home of my favorite city to visit—Seattle, WA. Surrounded by mountains and water, built on hills, draped in breathtakingly green raiment, covered by deep azure skies, and soaked in bountiful sunshine—summers in Seattle are simply gorgeous. I know they're notorious for their drizzle, but that's really mainly during the winter months. Summers totally make up for it.

There was a time when you could fly roundtrip to Seattle from Chicago for around $180. I think I visited there 3 times in a 9-month period back in 2002/2003. Ted went last year to drink beer with visit his bro Charles and sis-in-law Ali while I moped at home with Cadence. Now I'm itching to go back, but we've decided that we won't take any flying trips this year, unless it's Ted's dad who's doing the flying. Now that we have to buy a ticket for Cadence too, we'd have to spend at least $700 on airfare alone to go most places far away enough to justify flying. But still…

I really have a hankering for some fresh (flying) seafood at Pike Place market.

Or a REALLY AWESOME latte on Capitol Hill.

Or a picnic in Discovery Park.

Or watching folks busking on the street corners.

Or some really greasy pizza on The Ave.

Or a late night stroll through Red Square in UW.

Or just hanging out in Charles and Ali's backyard. And I could go on and on…

#3—I think I'm a total sap sometimes. It must the be whole getting old thing again.

Three Thoughts Thursday #3

#1—I've been missing the Rock 'n' Roll lifestyle lately. Maybe it's the whole turning 35 thing. Maybe I'm just stupid. Whatever the reason, I've determined to start going to more shows. Granted, if I get to see 3 shows in a year, that would qualify as MORE, but I was thinking more along the lines of at least twice a month. Holy shit. That sounds like a lot.

Anyhoo, I've got this lovely new camera that I'm dying to use on Chicago's best-lit venues, so who better to call upon than my dear friends Derek Becker of Satellite Booking and the Detholz! It just so happens that the 'Holz are headlining the I-Go Audio Emissions CD Release Party at the Metro tonight. I asked Derek if I could get a media pass so I could shoot photos, and he was nice enough to put me on the guestlist AND get me a media pass! The Metro happens to have my favorite lights in the city, so I'm really excited about the show tonight. And my friend Miss Mia of Chic-a-go-go is hosting the show, so I hope she tells all the tall folks to get the hell out of my way! Stay tuned for the photos…

#2—Speaking of the Detholz! show, I am hopefully going to get to meet someone at the show whose blog (erg, actually her Myspace page) I've been lurking on for a few months, and who it turns out has also been lurking on my blog! HA HA! That gets me a-thinkin' about the power of the Internet to establish relationships between folks who would otherwise be too shy to express their mutual admiration for one another in person. It also shows how the Internet brings out the inner stalker in all of us. I totally admit to that one.

#3—Cadence is growing up so fast. No, really. It's become more noticeable in just the past week or so. She's actually occasionally rational now. I can say to her, "We can't eat cookies for breakfast, but you can have an apple or an apricot," and she'll actually choose one of the latter two without argument 5% of the time. Or when I come home and she demands a nursing session right away, I can now say to her, "We'll do ma-ma-ma (her word for nursing) after I pee and change into something more comfortable (e.g., sans bra), and she'll actually say, "Okay."

Then again, she did have that screaming session yesterday evening about something I can't even remember, and I had to plug my ears or totally seriously risk hearing loss. It was flippin' loud, folks. I don't see how she's not deaf herself.

But still, overall I'm noticing that when I can't give her what she wants, as long as I get down on her level and give her some sort of explanation in a gentle, empathic voice, she'll resort to screaming in retaliation much less than she used to.

She's also beginning to understand aspects of the bigger world outside our little family. It kind of shocked me the other day when we were talking about church, and she tilts her head, nodding it up and down, and says, "Blbublaubl God? Blbublaubl Eesus?" Wow. So she knows that going to church has something to do with God and Jesus. Up to this point, she always associated church with Rudden (her best friend and baby love) and her other friends. And Matt the pianist whom we pick up every Sunday.

And then when we were at my cousin's house on Tuesday night, Baby Eden was propped up on her boppy while we were eating, and she started crying. Cadence was next to her, and looking really concerned, she says to me, "Blbublaubl wanna ah-zhoo!" No, she wasn't sneezing. Ah'-zhoo is her word for "be held." She knew that the baby wanted to be held and was alerting us to that fact.

So yeah, she's becoming spiritual AND compassionate. Totally growing up so fast.

Three Thoughts Thursday #2

#1--This one isn't so much a thought as it is a little piece of advice. "ALWAYS LOOK BEFORE YOU DRINK." That's right, folks. You never know what might be in that tall glass of yours. If I had heeded this little piece of common sense, I never would have ended up with a spider in my mouth this morning. And I'm not talking a little tiny jumper. It was at least half an inch big, and that's how I caught a blurry glimpse of something brown going in my mouth as I was taking my last gulp. Luckily, I had enough wits about me not to swallow, and after a second or two of blinking my eyes, wondering what the heck was floating in my mouth, I decided to spit the water back into my glass. That's when I saw the creepy critter, flailing its legs helplessly in the shallow pool of water in the bottom of my glass. I'm quite proud of myself that I somehow maintained composure instead of reacting how I normally do to spiders, which is to scream like a 2 year old who's had their cookie confiscated and to jump on the nearest chair. My still-sleeping family would not have appreciated that, I'm sure. I'm still kind of grossed out by the whole thing though. Ted and I are such big wussies when it comes to creepy crawly things. Cadence, on the other hand, hasn't learned to be afraid of them yet, and we're hoping to foster that lack of fear so that we can designate her the household bug remover (we don't squash—we relocate).

#2--In a couple of days, I will be celebrating my 35th birthday. I just can't believe how old that sounds. I mean, I remember watching the show thirtysomething when I was younger and thinking to myself that those folks were really old. And now, here I am. Not merely thirtysomething, like thirty-one or thirty-three, but undeniable and securely in my MID THIRTIES. Holy cow.

I have to admit, though, that I've always felt kind of old. I distinctly remember the last day of school in June of 1980. I was walking home, report card in hand, with all my little friends, when I had an epiphany. "Wow," I thought to myself, "I'm going to be in the 3rd grade in September. Now I'm REALLY old." And at 25, when I became a quarter of a century old, I grieved the loss of my youth and was convinced that any age greater than 25 sounded so egregiously old.

#3--Speaking of lost youth and being a kid, I sometimes wonder about all the events of my life, how so much was meaningful to me in that moment, but now, however, there seems to be so little that I actually remember. What happens to memories when you forget them? I suppose that by definition, they are not memories any more. It makes me wonder what juicy morsels of my past lie hidden in the deep recesses of my squishy brain. What friends have I forgotten, who were at the time so totally going to be my BFF? What heartache did i suffer that I was totally convinced I would never survive? What joys did I relish, not realizing then that the memory would someday fade? I wonder…