How to Dismantle Fear

I recently saw this on my beloved inspiration Jen Lemen's Flickr stream, and it hit me like a timely prophetic word. Dismantle Fear. DISMANTLE. FEAR. Yes, THAT is what I need to do. Take apart my fears one by one, render them powerless in my life. And maybe in doing so gain some hiddens morsels of insight as to who I am and where these fears have grown from and how to transplant courage and hope and trust and joy into those places where fear once had its roots.

Obviously, this will be no overnight task. You see, I am a woman of many fears. Spending your most formative years in a fundamentalist cult, being hurt in ways no child should ever be hurt, failing at relationships that you thought would last forever, watching your dad waste away before your very eyes. These are things that tend to plant seeds of fear in a person, seeds that eventually grow into stubborn weeds.

Well, I've started my personal process of Dismantling Fear, and I've decided to begin with the Fear of Not Being Worthy Of the Company I Keep. The lovely and talented Tracey of Mother May I presented me with the perfect opportunity to do this by inviting me to contribute to a new online community blog of women photographers called Shutter Sisters. When I looked at the list of amazing women who had already joined forces with Tracey, my first reaction was, "There's no way I'm good enough to be one of them. I'm just a cheesy mommyblogger!" I began my email to decline Tracey's offer. But then I realized that I have avoided being a part of anything that would potentially push my limits a bit and maybe, just maybe, make me GROW a little. I've always been so afraid of not being good enough. And yet, I knew from reading the blogs of these women that while they are intimidatingly talented, they are also kind and supportive and encouraging. So I said Yes to Tracey! And now I'm a Shutter Sister!

I am giddy with the prospects of collaborating with these women and other Shutter Sisters from all over the world, cyber and real. Please check us out! Better yet, join us!

I'm The Luckiest Girl On the Upper North Side

And why am I so lucky, you ask? Cuz I got to spend an evening out. At Uncommon Ground. With just girls. And not just any girls, mind you. I had the special treat of an evening with the inimitable Bella of Beyond the Map and Leigh of Mere Mortal. Although we had never met before last night, these two women have been a source of inspiration and hope for me in so many ways, through their words, their courage, their struggles, their honesty...

We talked and talked and laughed and laughed. I was surprised at how comfortable I felt, being the one who borders on social anxiety disorder. I mean, I really, REALLY had fun! Hopefully, we'll get to do this again, although Leigh was only visiting from Arizona. But Bella lives in Chicago. In fact, we're practically neighbors! Hopefully, we'll be grabbing lattes together at Metropolis often.