...last saturday was ian moore's show @ schubas...we took cadence to the harmony grill, the restaurant attached to schuba's music room, since that's a smoke-free environment, and introduced her to ian and chris [ian's tour manager & multi-instrumentalist] before their show...our friends phil (teal) and kiara also met up with us @ schubas to meet cadence, and miss mia was bartending so she got to meet cadence too...i think all the excitement of meeting all these new people was too much for the little one, and teddy & i had to scrap our plan of taking turns going into the show...i was glad though that cadence was born in time to meet ian while he was in town...



...ian and i talked about how 2 years had already passed since his youngest son was born...i still remember when ian called me that night he was born...i was actually walking from my car to schubas for a show...and now the little tike is already two...it just goes to show how quickly these babies grow...ian told us to enjoy cadence while she's this little, and i totally agree... i've got 5 1/2 weeks left before i have to go back to work, and i plan on holding my little cadence as much as possible and enjoying every moment with her during this time, whether it's during the day or in the middle of the night...



...teddy goes back to work next week...i can't even tell you how much it's meant to have him home full time these past couple of weeks...i know he's changed over a hundred diapers cuz i can count the number of diapers i've personally changed on my two hands...maybe just one hand...he's been a trooper...in addition to diaper duty, he's organized our former disaster of an apartment, kept up w/ the laundry, dishes, cooking, etc...i don't know how i'm going to manage without him home all day...i'm going to have to learn how to use the car seat and the stroller if i don't want to be stuck at home all day long...

...now that i have been a mom for 2.5 weeks, let me share with you just a few of my favorite things about being cadence's mom...

1) her little smile...call it a sleep grin, call it gas--it still melts my heart every time i see the lovely corners of her mouth turn up...and when she has her big eyes locked on yours and flashes you her gummy little smile, you just fall in love all over again...

2) watching her fall asleep in my arms...i admit that my arms have gotten quite sore from all the time they've put into rocking the little one, but when those eyelids finally droop shut and she drifts off into a peaceful slumber and she looks absolutely angelic nestled in your arms, you know it's an honor to be able to do this and someday you'll totally miss it...

3) her little yelps...the very first thing i experienced of cadence once she was born was hearing her try out her pipes, and boy oh boy could she cry! these days it's not so much the bloodcurdling wail as little yelps as she wakes up or realizes she's hungry, and some of her sounds are just so adorably girly...i know that there are folks who say that you should let a baby "cry it out" if you don't want to spoil them, and as much as i adore her every little sound, the one thing i can't do is just stand by if her little yelps become a real cry, with real tears...i don't care what the grandmas say...you can't spoil a baby this young, and it's just not natural for a mom to not respond to her baby's cries...and being able to scoop your little baby quivering with cries into your arms and comforting her is another one of parenthood's privileges and joys...

4) seeing teddy play with his little girl...they are just so cute together...seeing her little tiny body cuddled in daddy's strong arms is such a beautiful sight to me...i know she'll grow up absoultely adoring her daddy and vice versa...

5) her squirms and wiggles...esp. when she's sleeping...i mean, she can get a real workout it seems sometimes, the way she moves around so much...it's hard to keep a blanket on her...

...6) her smell...babies do have this lovely innocent smell, and since cadence is breastfed, even when she's poopy, she smells sweet...i just love the way her onsies smell after she's worn them all day...

7) her many many faces...not just her smiles...her pouty bottom lip, her wide-eyed-'O'-shaped- mouth face, her searching-for-a-nipple-while-asleep face, her mouth-wide-open-while-asleep face, her little-tongue-peeking-out face, etc...

8) her warmth and softness...there's nothing like feeling the warmth of her little body next to my chest when i cradle her in my arms...or the softness of her little face as i brush her forehead or cheeks with my lips...

...i'm sure i'll come up with a lot more in the days and weeks and months and years to come...for now, i know that she won't stay so little for long, and i want to enjoy being able to hold her in my arms for as long as i can...

...well, it's day 10 as parents, and teddy is already bemoaning how quickly these little ones grow up...we are settling into a routine (as routine as babies get), and i think we're pretty lucky in that cadence sleeps quite a bit...we've managed to get 7-8 hours of sleep at night, and i even got a couple hours of nap time this afternoon...we're getting to know our little girl's cues so that we can figure our what she needs...it's pretty simple...her needs are pretty much confined to boob, diaper change, and being held...she definitely has a personality even at this tender age, and we're getting to know her little quirks...we just love holding her and gazing into her lovely dark eyes for long periods of time...and she has these little girl squeals that communicate exactly how she feels...but for the most part, she is sweet and calm and absolutely adorable...



...i'm recovering pretty well from the surgery...my incision is not bothering me as much, and i can get in and out of bed without excruciating pain...my feet are finally deflating, and i hope to soon fit into shoes other than the black sandals i wore every single day since around the middle of may...as for my tummy, however, i have no idea how to deflate that anytime soon...i feel like i'm wearing a rubber doughnut around my waist...



...my mom's been coming over a lot, bringing me the traditional korean food for new moms which is seaweed soup...other folks have brought us food too...ted's mom who's an awesome cook brought us a turkey & veggie soup that tastes so wholesome & homemade...our friend nanette brought us a ton of boston market goodies, including some of my favorite comfort foods like mashed potatoes and mac & cheese...and derek & linda becker brought us a huge tupperware full of veggie chili and a huge round of corn bread...it's nice to have folks take care of us...god knows we need all the help we can get...

introducing for the very first time...

...alright, folks, here is the news we've all been waiting for...everyone, i would like to introduce to you CADENCE JOY , the most beautiful baby girl we've ever laid eyes on! here's the 411...cadence joy was born on friday, sept. 24th, 2004 at 11:24 am at rush pres-st. luke hospital in chicago...she weighed 7lbs 4oz, measured 20.75 inches long, and had APGARs of 9 & 9...teddy & i and everyone who's met her think she's totally adorable, and we are head over heels for her...

...so here's what happened...thursday night, as you may know, i spent the night at the hospital again being monitored, except this time i knew that i wasn't going home in the morning...due to my elevated blood pressure and the low amniotic fluid level, my doctor was having me sectioned in the morning...i have to admit i was pretty scared of the surgery, even though by this time i had accepted it as the best thing to do for all parties involvled, esp. the baby...i had to make a list for teddy to go home and fetch because we hadn't gotten around to packing our bag for the hospital yet...we slept better than the last time, but it was still far from what i'd call a restful night...i was just so worried about the baby...i mean, low amniotic fluid sounds AWFUL...the baby's heartbeat was strong, though, and the doctors didn't seem too worried...they kept saying the baby looked beautiful on the monitors...

...friday morning, they got us started for the surgery around 9am...my doctor had several surgeries that morning besides mine, and they fit me into the schedule...i was scared to death of the anesthesia part because i knew that i'd had problems in the past with getting numbed...my body just doesn't react fast enough, and i was scared that maybe i wouldn't get numb all the way, and i wouldn't know until my doctor sliced me open...as it turns out, the anesthesia part WAS the most difficult...apparently, i have a very tight spine, and the doctors couldn't find a spot to put in the epidural...after a couple unsuccessful attempts that took an eternity (maybe almost an hour) during which i had to stay bent over and very still (almost impossible considering they keep the operating room at about the temperature of nova scotia in january), they finally gave up on the epidural and gave me a spinal, which numbs you instantly...then everything went very quickly, ted was finally next to me, and i hear the doctor say, 'i see butt', and a few moments later, WAAAAHHHH!!!!! the doctor announces it's a girl, and i about fall over cuz i totally thought it was gonna be a boy, and i'm like, 'REALLY? it's a girl??!!' but i'm so happy, and boy oh boy does she have a set of lungs! ted gets to go watch while they do the stuff they do to babies when they're first born, so i'm alone again for a little while, and that's when things got weird...i found i couldn't swallow, and i couldn't breathe too well, and i could feel myself losing consciousness...i didn't know what was going on, but i felt like if i let myself drift off, i might not come back so i fought hard to stay awake...turns out the spinal had moved higher up than it was supposed to and that's why i felt like i wasn't breathing (even though i was) and i couldn't use my muscles to swallow...when teddy came back w/ the baby, i was so out of it, but i got a chance to look at the baby before they wheeled me off to recovery...it took a while for the spinal to wear off enough so that i could swallow and breathe freely, and it seemed forever before teddy came back with the baby...they had been at the nursery giving baby a bath and other stuff they do to babies, like getting footprints and measurements and all that jazz...finally, we were done...

...we got moved to a postpartum room where we would spend the weekend...our baby got to room with us, so she didn't leave either ted or me for the whole time at the hospital...even though the anesthesia gave me a scare, i recovered pretty quickly from surgery otherwise...we really love all the staff at rush who cared for us during our stay...they went out of their way to make sure we were comfortable and supported us as we got started as parents...they all gushed over cadence and made us feel like the proud mommy & daddy that we are now...

...oh, so saturday was my baby shower that ted's mom & sister threw...of course, i couldn't be there, but ted did represent for us, and he had a bunch of photos he'd taken of little cadence which he got to share, and every one was thrilled for us...

so that's the story in a nutshell...there's so much more, but i don't have the energy to tell it...we didn't decide on a name until i think sunday, so we're still getting used to it...most folks don't know what we're saying when we say her name is 'cadence', and i don't think my mom has got a full grasp on the name yet...basically, if you look up the word 'cadence' in the dictionary, you'd know why we chose that name...we decided on it because her hiccups and cries are so rhythmic...

...so now we're home, safe and sound...the apartment is a mess, but our family's helping us get the stuff together we need to take care of a baby... we're totally exhausted, and i admit i broke down and cried last night because it's really hard to take care of your baby the way you want to when you've got this big incision healing in your abdominal area, and every time you get up or sit down, it hurts like the dickens...all i want to do is hold little cadence and play with her, and i can't quite do that yet...and breastfeeding has been hard...she's actually developed a bit of jaundice from not eating well her first couple days, which is not uncommon with newborns whose livers are still immature...they sent us home w/ a biliblanket, which is a machine that emits UV light (which breaks down the bilirubin in the blood that gives jaundiced babies their yellow look) through a little pad that the baby has to wear until the bilirubin comes down to a normal level...so poor little cadence is tethered to this machine, and we've had to set up a little nest where we can eat, sleep, feed, change diapers, etc. within cord's reach from that machine....we go back to the pediatrician this afternoon for another test, and hopefully everything will be normal by then so we don't have to keep treating her w/ this UV lamp...

and i have to say that teddy is the best husband/father i could've ever hoped, wished, prayed, begged for...he's been totally taking care of our family, forgoing much beloved sleep and decent coffee & food, getting his hands dirty changing diapers, spending hours pouring love and care and affection over little cadence and me...i just know that cadence is gonna be a daddy's girl, and i can't wait to see their relationship blossom...

that's it for now...thanks to all of you for your good wishes, thoughts and prayers...we can't wait for you to meet our little bundle of cadence joy!

hi, folks...

i am writing this on a piece of scrap paper while lying in a bed in OB triage... the doctor was worried about me becoming preeclamptic and i got sent for monitoring again... i'm ok, but my amniotic fluid is low and my doctor decided it would be best to get the baby out before i do develop preeclampsia. since the baby is full term now, i'm having a c-section at 9am tomorrow... that's it for now... still no name...