More Ramblings

Burn-out. Isolation. Disengagement. Apathy. Complacency. Hopelessness. These are a few things I've been feeling from time to time. It's something I'm sure everybody deals with at some point. I just feel like there's something more to what's going on in my head and my heart lately than I'm fully able to grasp in the conscious realm (not to sound all mystical or anything).

For the past few years, I've felt that it was enough just to be a mom and to pay the bills. Both roles take up an inordinate amount of time and energy, that's for sure. Lately, though, I feel like I need to BE more. I don't really get it, but it's a feeling of needing to grow and stretch myself in ways I've been avoiding out of fear and laziness.

We're all broken in one way or numerous ways, and like anyone else, I'm looking for wholeness. I've avoided thinking about my broken parts and pieces for a long time, but they haven't fixed themselves, it seems, during my time of ignoring them. I've always had this need to keep myself together out of fear of totally falling apart. I'm still scared of that, but I think I can let myself unravel just a bit and see what happens.

Seriously, I'm just rambling here...It's Friday. I need a little grace.